Learning Objective: This is a discussion-conversation class. During the session, the students are expected to share their thoughts and explain some of the points given in the article. They will also have the chance to take a stand whether they agree or not with some of the points included in this article about shyness.




Can you remember the last time you stepped into a room full of strangers and felt that self-conscious and awkward feeling rush over you? Or that heart thumping moment when you wanted to ask someone on a date, but were too shy to do so? Or wanting to approach someone for business, but was too hesitant to actually do it? That anxiety in the pit of your stomach in social situations? Does it always feel like something is holding you back?



Regardless of whether you are introverted or extraverted, we can all relate to that feeling of shyness at some point in our lives. Socially, we tend to have the misconception that only introverts experience shyness, but that is not true. Shyness has more to do with being uncomfortable with one’s self, especially around other people.

This article is the result of collaboration between Amanda Linehan, an introvert, and Tina Su, an extravert. Together, we wanted to shed some light on the topic of shyness in a collective perspective from both extremes. We will also share the ways that we used to turn shyness into personal empowerment.

The Three Components of Shyness

According to Dr. Bernardo J. Carducci of the Shyness Research Institute, shyness has three components:

1. Excessive Self-Consciousness - you are overly aware of yourself, particularly in social situations.

2. Excessive Negative Self-Evaluation - you tend to see yourself negatively.

3. Excessive Negative Self-Preoccupation - you tend to pay too much attention to all the things you are doing wrong when you are around other people.

Why Do We Experience Shyness?

How to Overcome Shyness

We’ve both experienced different variations of shyness, and through practice and increased awareness we have both overcome this. The following are tips that have helped us overcome this uncomfortable feeling.

1. Understand Your Shyness

2. Turning Self Consciousness into Self Awareness

3. Find Your Strengths

4. Learn to Like Yourself

5. Not Conforming

6. Focus on Other People

7. Releasing Anxiety through Breath

8. Releasing Anxiety through Movement

9. Visualization

10. Affirmation

11. Do Not Leave an Uncomfortable Situation

12. Accept Rejection

13. Relinquish Perfectionism

14. Stop Labeling Yourself

15. Practice Social Skills

16. Practice Being in Uncomfortable Situations

17. The Three Questions

18. What is Comfortable for You?

19. Focus on the Moment

20. Seek and Record Your Successes

Express yourself

What are some of your moments of shyness?
What did you do to overcome them?

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